


Inspiration and Despair

by l8rose



Series: Unforgotten What Ifs [3]
Category: DAI - Fandom, Dragon Age, Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Bad Ending, Being changed, Consequences, Death, F/M, Inquisitor is a spiritborn, Not AU canon, One Shot, Painful rebirth, Post Trespasser, Rebirth, Solas takes down the veil, Twisted, not canon, what if
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-12
Updated: 2018-01-12
Packaged: 2019-03-04 01:43:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13353867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/l8rose/pseuds/l8rose
Summary: Solas has taken down the veil but there are consequences for his actions.





	Inspiration and Despair

**Author's Note:**

> A what if based on DGSD where Solas taking down the veil has consequences for the Inquisitor.

She watched as the sky changed, as the green hole widened above her.

She could feel it, the change that was coming to the world but it was not just out there.

She could feel it on the inside. A tearing that was wrong.

She would never return to Skyhold, she knew that now.

“I'm sorry.” Cole's voice was a whisper as he arrived.

“Cole... why... why does it hurt?” She asked as he gathered her up in his arms.

“You weren't supposed to be.” He actually clung to her. “Mythal made things broken. She didn't tell the truth.”

She lurched in his arms even as she felt like her limbs were being pulled from her. She couldn't feel the tips of her fingers, a numbness spreading down her hands.

“Can... can you take me to Solas?” She whispered, clinging to him.

“He is coming.” Cole said softly. “I wanted to see you before we change.”

“Cole?”

“I can't be me any more. You can't be you either.” Cole's voice was sad.

“Vhenan?” Solas called from the shadows beneath the tree line before he saw the two of them huddled together. “Cole? Why are you here?”

“I wanted to see her. Remember her.” Cole looked up at Solas with pain in his eyes. “Before she changes.”

“I can't... can't feel my hands...”

Solas' voice was a strangled cry of pain as he approached her, dropping to his knees beside her.

“Vhenan... Ethara...” He took her hand in his, lacing his fingers in her's.

“Solas...?” She questioned, turning her head but even her eye sight was going now. She could only make out his shape. “I thought... I thought I'd just die. Why... why does it feel... feel so wrong?”

“She does not know.” Cole's voice was sad but then it became startled. “You do not know.”

“I do not know what, Cole?” Solas looked up at him, questioning.

“Bright and shining.” Cole's voice became even more distressed. “She was not Knowledge or Hope. She was Inspiration.”

Ethara's head slid back even as Solas' voice became anguished.

“No... no.” He pulled her from Cole's arms and cradled her against his chest. “Vhenan, ir abelas. Please -”

“It's too late.” Cole's voice became more distant as he cut off Solas' words. “We can't be us. Not any more.”

The numbness spread, and she could no longer hear. Not Cole, not Solas, not even the sounds of the wind in the trees. There was silence.

She was aware of her heart, beating against her chest like a caged bird, then that too faded to nothing but consciousness did not end. 

Consciousness floated away from the moment as the sky changed to a new shade. 

There was no feeling of tearing as her whole mind seemed to shift. She became something new.

Something called to her and she crawled out of the darkness to find it.

There, sitting alone in the forest was an elf. In his hands was a body that had begun to crumble. Flaking away as it became nothing more then dust on the wind. She could feel his emotions. Despair, anguish, regret.

There were others who shared those feelings but none shown as brightly as he did.

With a twisted smile, she willed herself to take shape before him. She took on the form of the body that had once been in his arms, but twisted in nature with the change on the winds. The world was new again and she with it.

“You despair.” She was shrouded in darkness as she whispered to him.

His face jerked up, tears streaming from his eyes as he stared at her. There was recognition in those eyes but there was pain. So much pain.

“Ethara?” His voice was hesitant, almost afraid.

“Ethara?” She questioned before shaking her head. “No. I am...” She did not know what her name was, she simply knew what she was. “I am the absence of hope, the absence of dreams. I am all that was lost, never to be found again.”

“No, you... cannot be that.” He practically sobbed. “You were -”

“I am nothing.”

 


End file.
